she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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