why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize