there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I have tasted many bathrooms
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
