Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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