Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
