walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
50% drunk capacity currently
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
