I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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