The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
