How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
that's an acceptable place to lick
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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