My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
