i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
