There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
