so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
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