Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
