Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
