I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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