I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
