Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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