this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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