I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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