He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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