So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize