just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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