All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
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