no, he came in my armpit
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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