I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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