they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Randomize
