does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
