i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
