I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
