im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize