Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
