i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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