I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
