i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize