he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize