i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
