i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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