it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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