as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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