Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
