i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
i need some magic done to my vagina
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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