it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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