SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
do herpes really smell.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
