He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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