i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
