So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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