what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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