I hate all girls vehemently.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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