He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Randomize