I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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