I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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